“Chemical weapons? No, that couldn’t be right. Obama and Kerry promised Russia would take care of removing Assad’s stockpile.” New York, April 9 – Human Rights groups and international organizations have difficulty discerning that people in Syria are being slaughtered ...
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Feed SubscriptionStereotypes Are Bad Unless You’re A Progressive Enforcing Adherence To Them
By Linda Sarsour We all agree stereotypes are horrible, with ethnic stereotypes being the worst of the worst. For that reason, we must always avoid falling into the trap of stereotypes, except when conforming to them becomes a signal of ...
Read More »God Considering Russia, Syria For Genocide Of Palestinians Since Israel So Bad At It
Other countries can still submit applications and documented evidence of their capacity for the kind of ethnic cleansing and mass murder that Israel has only committed in the imaginations of its enemies. Heaven, April 8 – Supernal sources indicated today that the ...
Read More »New Record As Kids Still Using Afikoman Presents On Day 4 Of Passover
The feat bests the previous record forty-eight hours, set in 2008, by a family in Skokie, Illinois. Jerusalem, April 4 – Officials from Guinness World Records confirmed a new mark today upon certifying that the children of a local family are still ...
Read More »Fizzling “March Of Return” Leaves Joint List Short Of Recruitment Goals
“Exactly none of the dead come from a demographic that would join a Zionist, or even Jewish, party, and I think we all know why that is.” Umm el-Fahm, April 3 – Officials from the parties composing the political alliance ...
Read More »Logistical Problems: Only Some Hamas Units Equipped With Human Shields
“What am I supposed to do, send our fighters out to confront enemy soldiers while not violating six or seven laws of armed conflict?” Gaza City, March 28 – Tension gripped the Izzedin al-Qassam Brigades this week in advance of ...
Read More »BDS Advocate Has Already Won Like 6 Arguments In His Head During Shower
Actual humans do not make the same straw-man contentions as his mental interlocutors. New York, March 28 – A college student who spends time haranguing administrators, faculty, and fellow students to support divestment from Israel and boycott of the Israeli ...
Read More »Obama Gifts Iran With Echo Chamber Used In Pushing Nuke Deal
“What more fitting gesture could there be to demonstrate that appreciation than the very item that served us so well in selling the deal to the American public?” Chicago, March 27 – The president who engineered the nuclear pact with ...
Read More »Bribes To Female Judges Only 70% Of Bribes To Male Counterparts
“That’s a disturbing indication of what’s wrong with our society.” Tel Aviv, March 20 – A troubling new study points to systemic discrimination in Israel so deep that women judges receive, on average, bribes that are almost a third lower ...
Read More »Jews Don’t Control the Weather? What Do You Call The Ten Plagues?
by Trayon White, Washington, DC Council member Listen, I know it was bad form to engage in antisemitic tropes and portray the Jews as a monolithic, sinister, all-powerful group. I apologized – of course I apologized; it would be wrong ...
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