Turns Out I’ve Been Filing All Your Redemption Prayers Under ‘Wayfarers Begging For No Rain’

by God

Divine Throne Room, October 6 – OK so this is awkward.

You know how in your Yom Kippur liturgy – I get that many of you tuned out or were otherwise engaged during this part of the service – you invoke the prayer of the High Priest in the Holy of Holies, which includes a specific request not to heed the prayers of wayfarers when the world needs rain? So as it happens, um, I’ve kind of maybe had all of your prayers shunted into that “ignore” tray, and those might have included some beseeching for Messianic Days, deliverance from oppression, that sort of thing. My bad.

Let Me back up a little first. We’re in the interim period between when y’all start inserting praise of Me as the one who “causes the wind to blow and the rain to descend” in your thrice-daily services, as preparation for making the actual request for rain itself later on in the season. And the Talmud in Ta’anit cites the rationale for the insertion of the actual request being delayed until the seventh of Ḥeshvan – in the Land of Israel, at least – as providing time for the vast majority of pilgrims who came to Jerusalem for Sukkot to return to their homes first. It wouldn’t do to have people asking Me to make it rain, while those on the roads keep wanting the opposite.

You see where this is going. It seems that Somebody filed ALL individual requests for the last several thousand years under “requests from travelers to keep it from raining.” That Somebody is very, very sorry, I think you must know. Are we all better now?

I’m just going through some of the requests now that this mishap has been uncovered – did I say how sorry Somebody is? – and oh my Me, some of you got into – OK, that’s not fair – some of you found yourselves in a heap of trouble. I guess it’s a little late to save Jews from the Rhine Valley massacres that destroyed the communities of Mainz, Speyer, and Worms, for example, during the First Crusade? Also lots of crying out not to be burned at the stake, or not to be expelled from various locales; just asking to be spared overwhelming persecution at the hands of Muslim and Christian “host” societies.  Just seeing this now. Grim.

Also there’s a huge, huge cluster of these unheard supplications, some really strong ones, in the early 1940’s. Will have to look into that.

We good now?

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