The halal shortage began late last month, say Heavenly sources, when Chicago Cubs fans began using goats to try to reverse the 108-year-old curse on their favorite baseball club. Paradise, October 21 – Thousands of Muslims who gave their lives ...
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Feed SubscriptionThis Time Peacekeepers Won’t Rape Anyone, We Promise
By François Hollande, President of France Soon the United Nations Security Council will consider a French proposal to place international peacekeepers at the Temple Mount/Haram al-Sharif to maintain order and reduce tensions. While opposition to such a move is formidable ...
Read More »Meretz Bill Would OK Shouting ‘Fire’ In Crowded Theater Of Jews
None of the other countries in the region have laws prohibiting calling for harm to Jews. Jerusalem, October 19 – The current spate of violence has prompted the government to impose certain limits on basic freedoms and rights, including freedom of ...
Read More »Abbas Shocked His Peaceful Efforts Not Rewarded With Nobel
Abbas has reportedly spent the weeks since the award announcement alternately brooding and lashing out at staff. Ramallah, October 19 – Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas is still sore that the Nobel Peace Prize Committee spurned him as a recipient of ...
Read More »To Go With Palestinian Child Livers, Bistro Offers Fava Beans, Chianti
Hannibal introduced delicacies such as Tongue à la Nurse, acting with such casualness that her pulse likely never got above 85 in the process. Tel Aviv, October 18 – At Lecter, an upscale restaurant in downtown Tel Aviv, the wine list ...
Read More »Kerry Calls On Nazis, Jews To Stop Cycle Of Violence
Critics of the administration and of the secretary dismissed his announcement, saying the time is not ripe for such an attempt. Washington, October 18 – US Secretary of State John Kerry reprimanded Nazi Germany and European Jewry today, calling on ...
Read More »Hamas To Stab Gaza Children, Blame Israel, In Solidarity With W. Bank
The new policy will test whether Agence France-Presse, AP, CNN, the BBC, The Guardian, The New York Times, and other media outlets continue to uncritically parrot Palestinian claims of Israeli brutality and culpability even when the killings are committed by ...
Read More »To Prevent Al Aqsa Desecration, Palestinians To Torch It As Well
The move comes after Palestinian rioters set alight Joseph’s Tomb in Nablus (Shechem) last night, a site claimed as sacred by both Jews and Muslims. Jerusalem, October 16 – Religious leaders at Al Aqsa Mosque are planning to burn down ...
Read More »I Can’t Believe The Hypocrisy I Have To Defend Here At State
By John Kirby, State Department Spokesman As a former rear admiral in the US Navy and a PR and media relations officer for many years, I’ve faced my share of policies and activities that were a challenge to explain and ...
Read More »Zoabi: McFly Should Be Prosecuted For Knocking Over Defenseless Pine
“People who harm the defenseless, whether it is Palestinian children or Californian pines that leave behind a lone remnant, must face consequences.” Jerusalem, October 15 – An Arab lawmaker in Israel’s parliament said she has reviewed the video evidence of ...
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