PreOccupied Territory The News In Advance. Barely.

“I’m not twenty years old anymore.” Beit Shemesh, July 30 – A resident of this town southwest of Jerusalem plans to take full dietary advantage of the traditional Jewish practice of not eating for a full twenty-four hours from Wednesday ...

“We and our far-left allies in the UK and Europe share a profound attachment to the unattainable.” Beirut, July 29 – The Shiite militia that exerts de facto control of Lebanese politics on behalf of its Iranian masters asked the disgraced ...

“Free the Palestinian people from the yoke of Zionist oppression that has raised Arab incomes, life expectancy, and health care, and freedom indicators far beyond those of their neighbors.” Marmara, Turkey – A group of human rights activists vowed today ...

“The people in real power, the ones threatening the future for the rest of us, are the ones the media take pains to show in a negative light: Jews who adhere to tradition, you know, the ones who are largely ...

“I’m excited about this addition,” gushed Gimlin Patterson, a cryptozoology documentary filmmaker. Damascus, July 23 – Cryptozoologists and other enthusiasts of paranormal phenomena have begun including Assad regime claims of thwarted Israeli airborne operations in their logs of unconfirmed-but-definitely-real incidents, ...

by Roger Waters, washed-up musician London, July 23 – My social justice allies and I have grown weary of partisan accusations of “hypocrisy” surrounding my support for Boycott, Divest, Sanctions measures against Israel over its treatment of the Palestinians, while ...

“Whoever argues for us to take into account the concerns of Jews about their safety and security must have forgotten whom they’re addressing.” Amsterdam, July 22 – Continental states voiced shock today upon encountering the criticism of their providing money ...

The Remnant of Israel reached its allotted threshold of suffering and longing during the Spanish and Portuguese expulsions of Jewry in the late fifteenth century Jerusalem, July 21 – Heavenly sources disclosed today that the messianic visions of the Hebrew prophets ...

Instructions to FARS and smaller news operations included provisions outlining measures to avoid mentioning the same undamaged facilities too often. Tehran, July 20 – The Islamic Republic’s official media agency changed tacks today as a result of the string of mishaps, ...

“You’d think that as members of a tribe that has sat at the crux of global finance for generations, they might have some clue as to their status, but none seem to.” B’nei B’rak, July 16 – Residents of this ...