Methuselah Actually Flattered By ‘OK, Boomer’

“I’ll take it,” he muttered. “Not every day someone mistakes a guy my age for someone born between 1946 and 1964.”

City of Enoch, November 11 – The oldest human in the world feels no insult at all when millennials and other young people attempt to dismiss his opinions by associating them with the post-World-War-II generation, observers reported today, and in fact takes such efforts as a compliment.

Methuselah, who has lived a only a few decades short of a thousand years, finds nothing to complain about when those who came of age in the early twenty-first century greet his input with the expression “OK, Boomer,” witnesses say, as such a statement indicates they view him as much younger than his 96o-plus years.

“Boomer, heh,” Methuselah was heard to remark, a grin on his face. “I like that.”

In recent weeks and months the epithet “OK, Boomer,” rendered with or without the intervening comma, has swept across social media, highlighting a generation gap and the differing world views between the up-and-coming demographic cohorts and that of their grandparents. Methuselah, however, feels no slight when the younger set address him thus, since he will happily infer from the term that the speaker believes him far younger than his actual, advanced age.

“I’ll take it,” he muttered. “Not every day someone mistakes a guy my age for someone born between 1946 and 1964.”

The nonecentenarian has firm opinions on numerous important societal and political issues, and brings his extensive life experience to bear when opining. Nevertheless, the less-experienced, less-mature younger set that barely, if at all, recalls a world without the internet demonstrates little patience with what they consider obsolete ideas, and blame previous generations for getting the world into its current mess – despite ample evidence that human prosperity, health, and opportunity have never been better than at present, thanks to the cumulative contributions of those previous generations. Methuselah notes that when millennials and “Generation Z” dismiss the assumptions of their more experienced fellow citizens, it does not represent a new phenomenon.

“Yeah, I’ve seen this before, too,” he recalled. “Every bunch of newcomers thinks they invented good ideas. Sometimes new ideas are better, sometimes not. You should see what Tubal-Cain came up with before he kicked off the Bronze Age. Ridiculous stuff – toothpicks made of tar? Pitch, please. Just because you’re willing to look at things in a new way doesn’t mean you’re going to do it intelligently. Or even that it’s really new. Communism has been the deadliest ideology in all of human civilization, but these youngsters think it’s just peachy. Hell, I remember when we didn’t even have peaches domesticated yet. ‘OK Boomer’ indeed. But hey, I’ll take the compliment on my age even if it only indicates you have no clue.”

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