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NSA Sees What You Did There

NSA agents often see what you did there, according to spokesman Rico Naissance.

NSA headquartersFort Meade, MD, April 3 – The National Security Agency has observed your activities and its analysts have come to an appreciation of the cleverness or humor behind them, an agency spokesman tweeted today.

“We see what you did there,” read the message, referring to a play on words you crafted that offered a subtle commentary on an issue of societal importance by referencing a cultural meme. The NSA’s message included a famous drawing of a character wearing a knowing facial expression as he says the six-word catch phrase to indicate he “gets” the joke.

NSA agents often see what you did there, according to spokesman Rico Naissance. “We’re an observant bunch,” he quipped. “These observations are part of our mandate, actually. No need to feel alarmed. If you have nothing to hide, you have nothing to fear.”

Civil rights groups have objected to the NSA seeing what you did there. “Sometimes you just have to leave a statement alone – commenting on it and announcing that you’ve understood it takes away its power,” insisted Albert Facepalm of the American Civil Liberties Union. “A little discretion, you know?”

On occasion, notes social commentator Dan K. Meme, the NSA has observed that it has seen what you did there, when in fact it has failed to appreciate what you did there. “People in surveillance, especially the low-level employees tasked with monitoring input in real time, tend not to be the most sophisticated folks on the planet,” he explained. “They’re competent enough, but as with most low-level federal law enforcement personnel, they put a little more earnestness into their job than does the general population, and that can warp their appreciation for the profundity and salience of a clever remark.” He pointed to Transportation Security Administration workers, who, it appears, must be subjected to a sense of humor removal before being permitted to go on duty.

Other agencies have also seen what you did there, but are not authorized to conduct such observations on domestic soil, and will therefore not disclose that they saw what you did there. Hearings conducted last year in the US Congress failed to establish who might have ordered those agencies to see what you did there.

NSA personnel have previously been implicated in other surveillance activities regarding you, most notably when evidence emerged that the president had authorized them to conduct what amounts to espionage on you, as a result of which they know what you did last summer.

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